Not Liking My Choices..

So I've been sick for a little while. A week or two. When a person coughs up blood and vomits in the morning, naturally they'd freak out a bit.

I went to the doctor's and apparently it's out of these three options (listed in the order the doctor said what the cause might be):

1. TB
2. Cancer
   
   -dramatic pause and descriptions of the two above-
   
3. Burst capillaries from heavy coughing and inflamed throat.

WHY WOULD YOU SAY TB AND CANCER AND LET ME THINK THEY WERE THE ONLY TWO POSSIBILITIES, WOMAN? So it's most probably the third option since my coughing fits are ridiculous. If I cough up blood or anything like that again, I've got to get a chest x-ray. 

Merry Christmas to me.

OH WAIT. I got the job at Woolies! So a very, non-sarcastic-Merry Christmas to me!

Life Update

• I'm watching Narnia for the first time for Mary as a Christmas present and jfc it is fucking DARK. Is this really a children's movie? That scene where Aslan gets fucking tortured and humiliated and then killed on a creepy stone alter thing....man I couldn't believe it was all happening.
• I am really sick. Ughh. I am having these coughing fits that do not let me get any sleep at all.
• In the process of being evaluated for Woolworths. A new shop is opening near me and hopefully I get it.
• Fuck. Christmas is next week. What even.
  
• Update: I just reached the bit in Narnia as they ride into war AND THE WHITE WITCH IS WEARING ASLAN'S FUR INTO BATTLE. WHAT THE FUCK. THAT SHIT IS.MESSED.UP.

Please no

I'm having those feelings come back. Where stress and foreboding overwhelm my heart and my body and my mind. I am praying that this is just a medical thing or just a random phase that I'll get over. But the last time I had this feeling, something bad did happen. And, fuck, I really don't want to be right.

I have trouble breathing and nothing is really helping. Please pass over.